2008 Update

            2008 is the year I got old.  Paul Newman died at what one could describe as a ripe old age; a man was nominated for a major party’s presidential candidate who was born within a year of me (and I’m not talking about McCain, but thank you all who thought I was 135, or however old he is); and I got cancer.

            Breast cancer, to be exact, but I don’t want to go on and on about it.  I read that blogs that talk about breast cancer lose half their readership.  Since I am fairly sure I am the only faithful reader of at least this section of the website (even Nick doesn’t read it), I can’t afford the risk. 

            But surgery (during the summer) and chemotherapy (continuing until early November) aged me more than even the constant questions from former colleagues about how I’m enjoying retirement (I guess moving from the Senate to an income sucking pastime like farming – rather than an income enhancing profession like lobbying – is  thought to be more relaxing.  But let me tell you, we work hard to throw our money away – not like the cake walk of addictive gambling or running a Wall Street investment house (oh wait, they are throwing YOUR money away)).  My main topics of conversation since May have been my Doctors’ appointments, my various pains and stomach upsets, and whether I’m going to die.  I have become my grandmother in her last few years.

            I’ll spare you the details of the appointments and my nausea, but will let you know that I’m not going to die, at least not for a while, and very possibly not ever from the cancer that doctors assure me has been cut and poisoned out of my body.  They caught the cancer early (stage 2a for those of you who keep cancer score) – though not as early as initially thought, buying me an unexpected four months on chemotherapy, a lovely surprise to wake up to after surgery.

            And though I am grateful for the wonderful doctors who are going to cure me and the fabulous friends and family who are making bearable the overly long time the doctors are taking to affect the cure, I am utterly unappreciative for the opportunity fighting off a threat to my life has given me to reexamine my priorities. 

            Over the last five years, Nick and I, dragging with us whichever of our kids stood close enough to catch, consciously left the Washington DC power and image business to start our own business – one that would feed our family, literally and spiritually.  And it was (and is) working.

            So the stinkiest part of the cancer journey is that it is keeping me from focusing on the priorities I just got so nicely reordered.  And what will keep me going through three more chemotherapy treatments is the knowledge that that life, and the farm, are waiting for me when I get done being old.

            That is primarily because of Nick, who has kept the farm running, even growing, without help from me and while shuttling back and forth to Washington DC for my treatments.  Also to thank are our wonderful customers, who have remained loyal even through our erratic delivery schedules, the other Staunton Market vendors, who have stepped up with all manner of support, my mom, who has been with me every reluctant step of the way, and my old office that gave me some contract work that succeeded in making me stop feeling like a useless misfit.

            As for the farm, we (in the sense that means “Nick”) continued with vegetable, egg, chicken, sheep (wool and meat), and goat (wool and meat) production and added quail, duck, and meat rabbits (the latter two in the experimental stage until next year) to our menu of options.  Next year: partridge, turkey, and pig.

            And next year – a few more days off for Nick as I return to full time status, a few more visits from friends, especially those with whom I’ve reconnected during the last few months, and a return to what has become the normal life I love – the normal life I really did not need a bunch of rapidly dividing cells to teach me to appreciate. 

Kate Sparks-Auclair

September 2008

2005: THE BEGINNING

2007 UPDATE

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